Why are ghosts always honest? You can see right through them.
Why do bananas apply sunscreen? They peel so easily. (fixed missing word)
Why did the musician carry a ladder? To hit the high notes.
What's orange and talks like a parrot? A carrot.
I told my wife to hug her mistakes... she hugged me.
The future, the present, and the past went to a bar. The situation got a bit tense.
I worked as a banker before, but I didn't care anymore.
Have you heard about the guy who lost his entire left side? He's okay now.
I'm checking out a book about anti-gravity. I can't stop reading it.
My math teacher said I was average. That's so mean!
I kept thinking why the ball grew bigger. Then I understood.
I know all the electricians... we share such good connections right now.
I know many jokes about retired folks... but not a single one works.
The guy who lived through pepper spray and mustard gas is now a battle-hardened soldier.
I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high. She looked taken aback.
I once got so deep in debt that I couldn't even pay my electric bill. It was a gloomy period.
I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days so far.
My boss told me to have a good day so I left for home.
The guy who lived through falling into a coffee grinder now breaks new ground.
The inventor of Velcro has passed away. May he rest in peace.
